Parable of the Zombies…

I have two current obsessions.

I love zombie movies and the parable-ridden theology of Peter Rollins.  Given these two things, it seemed obvious that I should take a stab at writing a parable about zombies.

So…here it is…

The Parable of the Zombies…

Once there were three zombies.

Like all zombies they maintained their sorrowful existence by feasting on the flesh of those still living.  Their beastly, incoherent gruntings were their only communication.  Even this meager communication really only served to alert other zombies to the presence of living flesh to feast upon.

Through their entire dead/life none of the zombies ever really changed their ways.  None of them ever completely stopped eating people.


One zombie was proud to be a zombie.  He was glad to be who he was.

One zombie was ashamed.  He ate people because he couldn’t seem to help himself, but he always felt guilty.

One zombie was indifferent to the whole question.  He simply never thought about it.  He got hungry…He ate people.  He got sleepy…he laid down and slept.  Sunrise…Sunset…never a thought.

One day the zombie who felt guilty planted a garden.  Though he still ate people, from time to time he’d eat the vegetables from his garden instead.

The zombie who was proud to be a zombie was inspired by this.  He planted a small garden himself, and occasionally ate veggies instead of people as well.  Though he never completely gave up eating people either.

The indifferent zombie was busy doing zombie stuff and he missed the whole thing…


About Andrew

The Universe is Round. View all posts by Andrew

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